Category Archives: Christian Women

Stand Still.

I was listening to a sermon this morning on the radio… I almost changed the channel because I have less than a 10 minute commute and I just wanted some tunes.  I felt compelled not to.  It was from Exodus.  Which my church is also studying… think the Lord is trying to help me get some major points? haha

Well 20 minutes later, I’m sitting in the parking garage praying, crying, scribbling notes and being late to work.

The Lord has definitely been speaking to me lately, in a way that I haven’t felt or experienced in a long time.

I won’t speak too much to the many ways He is doing this right now… I feel like it’s probably too soon and I want to use discretion and wisdom in speaking on such topics (even on my own blog).

I will say though, this both scares and excites me.  I have a feeling my standing still won’t actually physically look like standing still and yet… I will be, and God will be doing the moving.

Who knows?  Only Him in reality!

I do know though that if He moves the way I think He is moving, I want ya’ll to see it.

I want to document it.

I want His glory seen and His salvation known and people to see that He is Lord over my life.

He is Yah.

Meditate on this today (I know I will be):

If the Lord tells you to move forward He won’t let you drown, what if you never see a sea in your life part, because you are too afraid to step forward?

You are praying about it?  Great! (Me too)

Don’t use prayer as an excuse not to proceed…

Exodus 14: 13- 15

And Moses said to the people, “Fear not, stand firm, and see the salvation of the LORD, which he will work for you today. For the Egyptians whom you see today, you shall never see again.  The LORD will fight for you, and you have only to be silent.”  The LORD said to Moses, “Why do you cry to me? Tell the people of Israel to go forward.

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Mothers aka Nurturers.

I am thinking about what it means to be a mother as “mother’s day” approaches.

I have always had an awesome mama.

I gained an awesome mama through marriage.

I think I am an awesome mama (most of the time).

I can’t help but think though, for some women, this is a painful day.

A reminder of what they don’t have and what they long for.

I feel so much joy to have Haddon and my moms.

I know that not everyone has a great relationship with their mom or mother in law.

I know friends that want to experience pregnancy, birth, adoption, etc. and they don’t know if it’s in God’s plan for their life…

There is nothing I can do but be thankful, pray, and offer encouragement.

So, would you like to know something so encouraging to almost all of us women?

That we are designed and capable of mothering.

I looked up mother in the concordance.

It can be a word used to refer to mothering… humans, relationships, animals and even as a place,  figurative language, or symbolically.

Eve was called the mother of all living, before she gave birth to sons.

How awesome is that?

Don’t most women mother humans, relationships, and/or animals?

Probably a lot of you mother all three.

Being mothers should not define us.  Our identities are in Christ.

Mothering is a gift we get to take part in.

No matter what your role of mothering, thank you for the way you nurture life.

If there is one definite word to characterize my understanding of mothering a human and parenting this year, it is: different

All families are different.

All situations are different.

All children are different.

All mothers are different.

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Happy Mother’s Day!

May you rely on His strength alone to be the best mother you can be, to whatever and whoever He has allowed you to mother.

Eyes Wide Open

This morning my husband woke me up and would not let me give him my “5 minutes” hand signal.

He cuddled me, took away my down comforter, told me the coffee was ready, he went through it all.

I finally got up, hugged him back with eyes closed and went to wake up my baby to feed him.  Sometimes I think it’s so unfair the schedule he has to follow because of Micah and my life… but anyway…

I fed him and hopped in the shower.

As I reached up to grab the shampoo I (still groggy) almost knocked over every bottle that was on the shelf.  My first reaction – shut your eyes as tight as you can!  I didn’t think about it.  It’s just what happened.

As if closing my eyes was really going to protect me from the falling boulders… okay bottles, but still.

How often in life do we do that, especially in periods of unknown or suffering? Just wait for it to all be over?  For the next season to come, and this one to pass?

The older I get and the more I desire to be like Him, I am realizing you cannot just “be carried” by Him and then look back like the poem Footprints would have us do.

Sure, there are times we need to be carried, need to close our eyes and be still.

But really, I am realizing I want to WATCH what He is doing in my life, even when I don’t understand it.

There is only one way I can do that in the here and now, without it being reflection, and that is to keep my eyes wide open.

I will try to be like my son, everything is new and sometimes enjoyable, most things are changing constantly, and almost everything is not understandable or always enjoyable – yet he still watches and he follows (sometimes with whining).

Lord, help me be like an uncomplaining child, secure in Your love for me and my identity in You, when it comes to You teaching me, help me know You always have the best planned.  Help me keep my eyes open to You and close them from the distractions and lies of this world. Amen.

 

eyeswideopen

This Weekend.

Byrd Ashley gets married.

When I first met her, I thought she was so cool.

I wanted to be her friend.

She couldn’t even remember my name so she would say “hey girl” when I would come up to her at church.

Good thing she asked someone for my name because we ended up becoming housemates and some of the best of friends.

This girl is hilarious. She is so forgiving.  Sacrificial.  Encouraging.  A hard worker.  Motivating.  Caring.  Wise.  Devoted.  Did I mention, funny?

My life is better because Byrd is in it.  I am more like Jesus because Byrd teaches me how to be.

This afternoon, I will travel to a place that has some of my fondest memories.

A place where the Lord changed my life forever and gave me a new heart.

I met some of the most amazing friends there and we did life together, a lot of it.

Byrd is one of those friends.

Our friends have been through quite the gamut – births, deaths, divorces, break-ups, get-togethers, ministry, moves, marriage – you name it.

Byrd is a rock.  She is strong when many of us our weak.

This weekend, the last of the “ministry house” ladies is getting hitched.

Joining her life with an amazing godly man.  I can already feel the tears and the lump in my throat.

I am so full of gratitude.

It is so amazing to see the Lord’s handiwork and the way He has been weaving all our lives.

I am so glad she is part of mine and can’t wait to stand up there as she enters into a marriage covenant with the amazing Andrew Campbell (he would need a whole other post. this guy is legit).

Andrew & Ashley we hope this weekend (and next week of course) is nothing short of awesome.

byrd

PS: you are the only gal Im okay with Micah running his fingers through your hair 😉 hope Andrew doesnt mind!

 

Okay sentimental stuff over,

This weekend I will also:

  • Hopefully finish the Hobbit with Micah during our car rides.
  • Leave my baby overnight for the first time so I can spend the night with the girls (pray for me! Micah said he is sleeping outside with Haddon… don’t worry not in the cold he won’t).
  • Eat Taste of Thai food
  • Get in lots of sweet girl time, oh how I miss them!
  • Stare at the mountains and soak in that majesty.

Great Expectations.

“while we wait for the blessed hope the glorious appearing of our great God and Savior, who gave Himself to redeem us from all wickedness.” Titus 2:13-14  

I can’t help but think of the millions of lives that were saved from the wrath of Sandy thanks to social media and technology.  I know many are suffering today and will be for a while but seriously, think of how much worse it could have been without warning.

How weird would it be if tornadoes, hurricanes, etc came from seemingly out of nowhere?

No stocking up on food.  No inviting people over to ride it out together.  No preparation.

We live in a day and age where Facebook can inform us just as much if not more than watching the news.

We can warn each other and update each other in less than a second.  How amazing.

However…

I also can’t help but think of Christ’s return when these “events” make us all a little more expectant.

I don’t know a lot about eschatology but I think I can make the following conclusions from what I do know:

  • There will be no time to update Facebook and warn our friends.
  • There will be no time to do things differently.
  • There will be no “protecting” our things.  They won’t be coming with us.
  • There will be no helping our friends AFTER the event (like in natural disasters where we can provide relief and aid).  We must help BEFORE the event.

REPENT therefore, and turn again, that your sins may be blotted out  ACTS 3:19

But the day of the Lord will come like a thief, and then the heavens will pass away with a roar, and the heavenly bodies will be burned up and dissolved, and the earth and the works that are done on it will be exposed. 2 Peter 3:10

“If I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am.” John 14:3

“Men of Galilee, why do you stand looking into the sky? This same Jesus, who has been taken from you into heaven, will come back in the same way you have seen Him go to heaven.” – Acts 1:11

“as you eagerly wait for the Lord Jesus to be revealed. He will keep you strong to the end, so that you will be blameless on the day of our Lord Jesus Christ.” – 1 Corinthians 1:7-8

“Christ was sacrificed once to take away the sins of many people and He will appear a second time, not to bear sin, but to bring salvation to those who are waiting for Him.” Hebrews 9:27

“You turned to God from idols to serve a living and true God, and to wait for His Son from heaven, who rescues us from the wrath to come.” 1 Thessalonians 1:10
“They will be punished with everlasting destruction on the day He comes to be glorified in His holy people, and to be marveled at among all those who have believed.” 2 Thessalonians 1:9-10
“Then the lawless one will be revealed, whom the Lord Jesus will overthrow with the breath of His mouth and destroy by the splendor of His coming.” 2 Thessalonians 2:8
“Set your hope fully on the grace to be given you when Christ is revealed.” 1 Peter 1:16

“Behold, I am coming soon. My reward is with me, and I will give to everyone according to what he has done.” Revelation 22:12

Sin and a Savior.

My heart and mind have been so consumed lately with the law.  Something I have been trying to figure out since I started studying the bible in college.

We are studying through the book of Exodus at church and let’s just go ahead and say we are all lawbreakers.

While I study these commandments I see my sin so clearly, and isn’t that part of their purpose?  To show us our desperate need of a Savior?

Thinking through even the Ten Commandments…a quick thought about all ten…

  1. I often times turn to myself as ruler of my life
  2. I definitely have what many would consider graven images or images made in likeness (in fact I don’t even see how it is possible for the 21st century population to avoid them completely)
  3. I frequently use His name falsely
  4. I don’t remember the last time that I purposely rested in Him (especially for a whole day!)
  5. T here were many times in my life I did NOT honor my mother and father
  6. I have been angry
  7. There has been adultery
  8. Things were taken
  9. I have spun stories and the way I say things
  10. I covet (a lot to be honest)

Praise Yahweh for His son and the crazy awesome way He has set us free from the chains and bondage that we were in.

People back then couldn’t keep law perfectly.  We can’t keep law perfectly and anyone who says they do is a liar and we should be wary of them.

You saw that I wrote how is it possible in the 21st century to avoid it completely?  It isn’t, it wasn’t then, and it isn’t now!

I won’t pretend I understand the law perfectly, let’s be real – even very well! I also don’t want to just say, grace, grace, grace and do what I want.  I want Him to search me and know my heart, to try me and know my ways and see if there is any wicked way in me and lead me in the way of everlasting life.

I want to remove every worldly, brainwashed, influenced thought from my mind and trust in Him with all my heart, lean not on my own understanding, and in all my ways the best I know how, acknowledge Him, and He will direct my paths.

I am so thankful that He completes the works He starts and does not leave us or forsake us.

I am so confident that He knows my heart and mind better than I know it for He fashioned them and gives them life no matter what they are fed.

Just some mumblings of my spiritual life lately… 😉  thanks for reading.

“Grace and peace to you from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ, who gave himself for our sins to rescue us from the present evil age, according to the will of our God and Father, to whom be glory forever and ever. Amen.” Galatians 1:3-5

Companionship.

by Micah.

Have you heard the question posed to a married couple, “what’s your favorite part about being married?” I have. Sarah asks me what seems to be tri-annually.

My go-to answer, and I think it’s accurate, is companionship. This is often the answer that I hear from others as well. It’s sometimes fleshed out by the newly married individual saying “it’s just so nice not having to leave at night.” I’ll never forget Dan Bergey talking to me about him and Simone before Sarah and I were married and he described it as being a lost puppy dog when Simone wasn’t around!

This week has confirmed that. Haddon in the equation adds to the love of others’ presence factor. I’ve been in Delaware for training all week and it’s Sarah’s first week back at work. It was so nice to be able to go home to Sarah…even if she’s occupied and can’t converse or do anything that has to do with me at all!

Being away does help me appreciate my wife, and therefore comprehend the unity that God has molded us into as well. It is difficult to live as “one-flesh” while states away from one-another. It helps my sympathize for those in the military all the more as this is barely a taste of the mouthful that they must stomach.

 

Sarah and I are meandering through Galatians with one another from afar. She wisely picked it as we as a church are going through the law in Exodus and understanding our ability to apply it through Christ. There is in Galatians a consistent theme of “without faith in Christ, your efforts are futile.”

It has been a blessing to learn lately that

A.                    Part of the law’s intentions (as a gift from the LORD) are to point us to our need for Christ

B.                    Paul writes the Galatians to reveal that those who put their faith/trust in the Gospel of Christ will be led to rely on another

C.                    God created the concept of marriage (me and Sarah, for example) in order to image-forth the future relationship between His Son and His followers (me/the church and Jesus)

Of course I can break many of the commandments by relying on Sarah’s companionship too much…but Jesus’ commandments are not burdensome (1 John 5:3) and I’m thankful for marriage helping me understand the Gospel and the Gospel helping me understand how to miss Sarah while separated during marriage.

Haddon, if you ever read this sorry there’s a lack of mentioning of you but I do smile every time your wonderful mother sends me pictures of you and I can’t wait change your diapers while you scream because you’re on your back….and then smother you with my bearded kisses!

Back to Work.

Today I held my son with one arm and held my briefcase and pump bag on the other arm, I kissed him goodbye and waved at him and his grandmother as I drove off.

I am back at work today and Haddon is staying at home with his paternal grandmother.  I am going home at lunch to feed Haddon.

It has made the transition much easier knowing she is there and he can ease his way into having me gone in his own house.

The past two weeks have been particularly wonderful.  Once I started supplementing with a little formula Haddon was like a new baby!  Slept better, “played” harder, cooed louder, it has been amazing to see.  It could be his age too but either way, we have had fun.

The past three months have been the hardest work of my life.

We have had amazing service bestowed on us through friends and family and I am so ready to glorify God with the work of my hands in my family life and now work life.

I just hope I stay busy at work so I’m not thinking about making funny faces with Haddon all day.  I do miss him but this isn’t as hard as could be expected (so far).  I am looking forward to getting a schedule/routine down each day.  I mean I was up, showered, teeth and hair brushed, both of us fed, etc all before 9 am.  That hasn’t happened in a long time!

C2 set up a mommy room for me to pump which is great, especially considering I had a letdown about 20 min after I got here.

I am praying that my time with Haddon and Micah will be so meaningful and I won’t take a second for granted.

In whatever you do, do it all for His glory.

Be thankful in and for all things and see God’s teachings in everything you do today and every day.

On the agenda for tonight: working out and snuggling.

A Joyful Mother.

I almost didnt publish this because it has been a good day but I want to be honest.

These past few days have been rough.  Rough is an understatement really for the emotional turmoil my son’s digestive track is wrecking in my heart and mind.

While I am so thankful he is eating…

This week Haddon has been SO fussy, will only take naps if I am wearing him, needs to be held constantly, hardly smiley during his play/wake time, etc.

This morning is different.  I feel happier.

Circumstantial happiness:

He slept pretty well last night and even though I am wearing him right now as he goes on 2hrs of a nap I am getting lots of stuff done (today that includes doing my hair, makeup, two loads of laundry, making up two beds, sweeping three floors, moving some boxes, bringing in the cloth diapers from the line, and brushing my teeth).

I read in My Utmost for His Highest this morning this devotion

Whew.

My joy has to come in doing this parenting thing because it is what the Lord has given me.  It is a great reward despite the difficult days.  The Lord’s will for my life is sanctification.  That has come in many ways including marriage and now mothering.

I’ve called Haddon, Haddon the handful (and Mr. grumpy pants) more than once this week to different people.  The truth is though he is human and some days his belly is going to hurt, he’s going to be gassy, or just plain in a bad mood sometimes.  Don’t we all have those days?

If I cant be joyful in my duty when he is an adorable baby, how will I handle the yucky stuff as he grows into a boy then man?

I am choosing to be joyful.  I want my son to feel that he was always loved and sacrificed for unconditionally no matter how he acted.

Hmm I guess I’m learning a little about the Father’s love for this wretched sinner that I am.  I sure am glad He parents me through the hard times and for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross.

Not because it made Him happy, no, but he counted it as great joy.

Just as a disclaimer, I do have plenty of happy moments with Haddon, but this parenting business is no easy feat and despite the adorable pictures I might post there are some crazy times.  Maybe I will have Micah take a picture of those. hah

Two Years.

since the beginning of the most amazing adventure…

This is going to be a short post darling because, well our anniversary present for this year needs to be fed!

You amaze and inspire me daily.  Thank you for loving me so well.

Happy Two Year Anniversary darling!!  I love you more with every moment.