God’s Gift of a Wife- from Micah.
Thanks so much for showing interest in our lives and reading the updates that Sarah has provided (I’m very thankful for her doing so too!). We hope that they will in some way be beneficial to you enjoying Jesus in any way the Spirit makes that happen. We also hope that it provides information for you to know how to pray for us!
It is going to be difficult to narrow down what to write about so I’ll write about what is easiest for me: my wife and what marriage has taught me. I call Sarah God’s “chiseling tool” because she is always changing me in ways that I enjoy.
The King of Israel, Solomon has the reputation for being wise. I vividly remember being in Aaron Proffitt and Jon Halterman’s bible study a few years back (when almost all that I knew about Christianity was that I claimed to be one!) when studying the topic of marriage that the verse in Proverbs, which was written by Solomon, came up “He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord.”- Proverbs 18:22. Although at that time I really did not personally understand the wisdom of Solomon I am so grateful that the Lord has changed my priorities to finding joy and appreciating the “good thing” that I found, and that I continually am privileged to pursue.
It is extremely easy to love Sarah. What you see of her is consistent 24/7. Although she is a sinner undeservingly saved by the grace of God because Jesus received the wrath that she deserved for her sins so that we could substitutionally receive Jesus’ righteousness, just like me, she loves the Lord and lives a life that resembles the life-transforming power of God. She is a doll. I love to hug and kiss her. I love to sit beside her in all situations. I love to go to sleep and wake up cuddling her. I have no shame and do not risk my masculinity in saying such cheesy things! I can honestly say that somehow I love her more than 6 months ago (we got married 6 months and a day ago!) and more than the first day of dating.
That being said, I think it’s beneficial for us to reflect on some of the most significant things that people have said to me that have been such great little gold nuggets of advice. They all are of course to be built upon the foundations of God’s word and specifically what He has told us about marriage. Most beneficial for Sarah and I to remember is that our marriage has the ultimate purpose of mimicking, being a picture of, pointing toward, showing evidence of, and revealing the same relationship that Jesus has with His bride, the Church. This is best unpacked by Paul in Ephesians 5. Simply, I am to love Sarah as Christ loves us (yes, unattainable, I know), and Sarah is to strive toward resembling the respect and leadership that we are to show the Lord, Jesus Christ (as undeserving as I am!). Also, “what God has joined, let no man separate.” That’s our goal. Our “honeymoon stage” will no doubt fade in ways, but we are obedient first to God. He is a wise law-giver, and I trust that when Sarah and I are old, no matter what we both make each other put up with, we will be glad that we stuck to our promises to one another in our vows.
Sarah’s father- “Be upfront.” I think that’s all he said but it struck a loud note as Sarah and I have continuously emphasized it (he told me this the day I asked permission to date her and it was a great benefit).
Jeremy (my brother: he wrote me an email of advice after I told him I was going to ask Sarah to marry me)- “do everything with her. Exercise, pray, read, worship, sing, travel, coordinate, plan, etc..” Kicking off unity with a month long road trip was a great catalyst to this practice, but it is still beneficial today.
Kevin Anderson (while he was teaching about marriage from the discipleship course in bible study this past year)- “Husbands are to love their wives into submission” Ephesians 5:22 says “Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord” Yes, wives should submit to their husbands but true submission is “service with a (genuine) smile.” It is a result of how the Lord loves His bride, the Church, that we (the church) submit to Him with joy, and not out of discontent! It is also a result of the Christian not acknowledging and appreciating the Savior if he or she does not enjoy following his or her Lord’s leading. The point is that the Christian enjoys serving the Lord because of the Lord’s love for the Christian! Submission is subsequent to love. My wife and I need to be in unity, and that requires me constantly being eager to lavish her with Savior-like love. So, Kevin should at this point be thanked by Sarah and any other wife who’s husband reads this and responds to Paul’s advice!
Paul Fiske- “Don’t take anything personal” I didn’t realize that this was actually good advice until we got married….and then we lived together. Previously nothing was really said or done that would have bothered me!
Bill and Cindy Evans- “Hit the knees to to pray and seek God’s guidance before anything else.” The Spirit is eager to search my mind, Sarah’s mind, and God’s will. Even better He is eager to guide is through any and all things no matter what the situation.
Dad- (he said that while we were engaged) “once you get married she’s going to put you in the washing machine” (referring to my standard of cleanliness around the house) He was right…I now clean.
I was writing more, but just deleted it because this is far too long! Thanks for reading and I hope that you’ll continue to pray for Sarah and me. (I need a job too!)
Although Christmas is past let’s continue to remember the incarnation and live like He died for us!
P.S. Most beneficial book that I’ve read pertaining to being a husband is “Exemplary Husband” by Stuart Scott (no, not the ESPN guy!). So good that I unregrettably got it for my groomsmen! For men and women: “This Momentary Marriage” by John Piper. Both can be used as a topical guidebook.